3 Things to Say “No” to This Holiday Season (Without the Guilt): A Q&A Guide

The holidays can be a joyful time, but they can also bring pressure – from packed schedules to high expectations. It’s easy to get caught up in saying “yes” to everything, only to end up feeling exhausted and overwhelmed. But what if you could set a few gentle boundaries and say “no” to what doesn’t serve you, without the guilt?

In this Q&A guide, we’ll explore three common holiday challenges and share ways to gracefully say “no” to them so you can focus on what truly matters.

---

Q: How Do I Say “No” to Overcommitting My Schedule?

A: It can feel difficult to decline invitations and gatherings, especially when you want to be there for everyone. However, overcommitting leaves little time for rest and self-care, and often leads to burnout. Setting healthy boundaries is essential for reducing stress and staying emotionally balanced during high-demand seasons.

Try This:

1. Set an Event Limit: Decide in advance how many events you can realistically attend each week. Communicate this boundary with friends and family early on.

2. Use “Thank and Decline”: Practice saying, “Thank you so much for inviting me! I won’t be able to make it this time, but I’d love to connect soon.” Expressing gratitude makes it easier to say no without guilt.

Bonus Journal Prompt: “How does my schedule reflect my holiday priorities? What can I let go of to feel more present?”

---

Q: How Can I Let Go of the “Perfect” Holiday Decor?

A: Holiday decor can be a fun way to celebrate the season, but aiming for a Pinterest-perfect setup often adds unnecessary stress. Instead, think about what makes your space feel festive to you, and let go of the pressure to make everything look flawless. Perfectionism is often a barrier to joy, especially during high-stakes times like the holidays

Try This:

1. Choose a Signature Element: Pick one decor element you love (like twinkle lights or a favourite ornament), and let that set the tone. Focus on what you truly enjoy rather than a “perfect” overall look.

2. Embrace Minimalism: Simplifying your decor can actually enhance its impact. Select a few meaningful pieces, and allow yourself to skip or scale back on the rest.

Bonus Journal Prompt: “What does a meaningful holiday atmosphere look like to me? Which traditions can I simplify?”

---

Q: How Do I Say “No” to Self-Criticism This Season?

A: Self-criticism can sneak in during the holidays, especially when you’re trying to keep up with expectations or feeling the effects of comparison. Research on self-compassion by Dr. Kristin Neff suggests that treating yourself with kindness and understanding can significantly improve mental and emotional well-being

Try This:

1. The “Friend Check”: When you catch yourself in a cycle of self-criticism, pause and ask, “Would I say this to a friend?” Often, we’re kinder to others than to ourselves. Shifting this perspective can help soften critical thoughts.

2. Create a “Self-Care Mantra”: Choose a comforting phrase, like “I’m doing my best” or “It’s okay to be well-ish.” Use this mantra whenever self-criticism starts creeping in.

Bonus Journal Prompt: “What am I grateful for in myself this season? How can I nurture a sense of compassion?”

---

Gentle Actions for a Boundaries-Based Holiday Season

Here are three simple actions you can try to help reinforce these boundaries and make this season feel calmer and more aligned with your well-being:

1. Create a “Holiday Well-being List”: Instead of a to-do list, make a list of small things that bring you joy or calm. Keep it somewhere visible as a reminder to prioritise these throughout the season.

2. Set a “Self-Compassion Break” Reminder: Use your phone or calendar to set daily reminders to take a self-compassion break. Even a few minutes each day can make a difference.

3. Visualise Your Ideal Holiday: Before diving into holiday preparations, take a moment to imagine your ideal holiday season. Picture it in detail: What are you doing (or not doing)? Who are you spending time with? Use this vision as a guide when making decisions.

---

Embrace a Holiday that Feels Right for You

This holiday season, saying “no” doesn’t have to be difficult or guilt-inducing. By setting gentle boundaries and focusing on what truly matters, you can create a season that’s joyful, calm, and fulfilling. Let go of the need to be everywhere, decorate perfectly, or criticise yourself for small missteps. Instead, celebrate the moments that bring you peace and presence.

If you’re ready for more ways to simplify the season and focus on what matters most, sign up for our Well-ish Guide to Feeling Better this Holiday Season! Discover gentle, meaningful tips for a holiday that feels just right.

A Better Way to Well: 5 Lessons for Everyday Well-Being

Well-being can feel like an elusive goal, especially when we’re bombarded with conflicting advice and expectations. Over the years, as a co-founder of If Lost, Start Here—a well-being company focused on helping people find their way—I’ve learned some surprising truths about what it really means to feel better in our everyday lives.

Here are five lessons that might help you rethink your own well-being journey.

---

1. Sometimes, it’s not us—it’s the situation.

How often do we blame ourselves when we don’t seem to “fit”? We’re told to adapt, to be more resilient, to “tough it out.” But what if the problem isn’t you at all—it’s the environment you’re in?

For over a decade, I worked in the art world, constantly questioning myself. Was I too quiet? Too sensitive? Too “wrong”? But when I transitioned into spaces focused on empathy, listening, and one-to-one connection—like coaching calls or well-being conversations—I thrived.

The truth is, not every situation is meant to work for every person. Trying to mould yourself to fit an environment that doesn’t align with your values or strengths only serves to stifle you. Sometimes, the bravest thing you can do is to move toward a space that lets you show up fully as yourself.

---

2. Mental wellness looks different for everyone.

Traditional mental wellness can feel like a one-size-fits-all solution—usually oriented towards therapy or medication. But now, we’re embracing a more nuanced approach: recognising that everyone’s well-being path is unique.

That’s why we created If Lost, Start Here as a choose-your-own-adventure well-being company. For me, mental wellness starts with awe, wonder, creativity, and connection. For my co-founder, it’s time in nature, movement, and stepping away from technology. What works for me might not work for her, and that’s okay. The key is finding what resonates with you—and knowing there are many ways to care for your mental and emotional well-being.

---

3. The therapeutic is everywhere.

When I realised the art world wasn’t for me, I started to retrain in psychotherapy and coaching. But over time, I’ve discovered that the therapeutic is everywhere: in the spaces we create, the communities we nurture, and the moments of connection we share

From a thoughtful prompt to a quiet moment in nature, the world is full of opportunities to support better well-being. It’s not just about what happens in a conversation one-on-one but extends to and comes from how we choose to engage with what’s around us outside that relationship too.

---

4. Progress doesn’t always look like progress.

Our culture tends to value action—forward momentum, measurable results, and quick fixes. But well-being doesn’t always work that way. In fact, some of the most profound progress comes when we pause.

Sometimes, progress means sitting with discomfort, taking a step back, or simply resting when everything around us screams, “Do More” Allowing yourself to stop striving is a radical act of self-care in a world that glorifies busyness.

---

5. It’s okay not to have it all figured out.

When we started If Lost, Start Here, I thought I needed all the answers. How could I guide others if I was still navigating my own questions? But I quickly learned that well-being isn’t about having a perfect plan—it’s about curiosity, experimentation, and a willingness to embrace the unknown.

We’re all navigating life’s uncertainties. The most important thing is to show up, stay open, and trust the process. Sometimes, it’s in the spaces between certainty and doubt that we find the answers we’re looking for.

---

Find Your Better Way to Well

The path to well-being isn’t linear—it’s personal, evolving, and sometimes messy. What matters is finding what works for you.

If you’re looking for a way to start, we’ve created A Better Way to Well, a free five-part email series designed to help you cut through the noise and connect with what truly matters. You’ll receive practical, research-backed prompts to help you reflect, reset, and create your own personalised approach to well-being.

Sign up here and take the first small step toward feeling better in your everyday life.

Overwhelmed by Emotions? How to Find Calm and Clarity in the Chaos

For some of us, the challenge isn’t feeling too little but feeling too much. If you’re experiencing waves of emotions—sadness, anger, fear, even joy—that seem to come and go without warning, it can feel overwhelming and chaotic. You may find yourself wondering how to make sense of it all or how to bring even a small sense of calm back into your life.

In times of emotional overload, finding peace doesn’t mean pushing feelings away; it means creating a safe space to explore and understand them, gently and with compassion.

Here are a few ways to begin calming the chaos.

1. Let Your Emotions Be Messy

Big emotions don’t need to be “fixed” or “neatened up”—they’re allowed to be messy. Remind yourself that it’s okay to feel multiple things at once or to feel things that don’t make immediate sense. Instead of trying to make your emotions fit into a box, allow yourself to experience them without judgment. Sometimes, just naming what you’re feeling (“I’m feeling sad, and frustrated, and maybe a bit confused”) can help ease their intensity.

2. Ground Yourself in the Present Moment

When emotions are swirling, it’s easy to get swept up in their intensity. Grounding techniques can help you re-center, giving you a moment to breathe and gain perspective. Try focusing on your surroundings by noticing five things you can see, four you can touch, three you can hear, two you can smell, and one you can taste. This gentle exercise can bring you back to the present, helping to steady the waves of emotion.

3. Talk It Out with a Trusted Friend or Journal

Sometimes, emotions become less overwhelming when we give them a voice. If you’re comfortable, consider sharing what you’re feeling with a friend, or write about it in a journal. The act of putting feelings into words can help clarify what’s happening inside, making the emotions feel more manageable. And if you’re not sure what to say, start with “I don’t really know what I’m feeling, but here’s what’s coming up.”

4. Practice Deep Breathing to Create Calm

When emotions feel overwhelming, our bodies often tense up in response. Deep breathing can help signal to your nervous system that it’s safe to relax. Try a simple breathing technique: inhale deeply for a count of four, hold for four, and exhale for four. Repeat this a few times until you feel a bit more settled. This small act can create a moment of calm, allowing you to process what’s there.

---

Understanding Your Emotions with Patience and Compassion

Emotional overwhelm can feel like a storm, but even in the midst of it, there’s a path toward calm. Take each moment one step at a time, knowing that you don’t have to navigate it alone. By grounding yourself, letting your emotions flow without judgment, and reaching out for support, you’re creating space for clarity, calm, and a little bit of peace.

If you’d like support in navigating your emotional life right now our emotions coaching sessions are here to help. Together, we’ll explore what’s there and find gentle ways forward.

Feeling “Well-ish” is Enough: Embracing a Balanced Holiday Season

With the holiday season often comes the expectation to be our “best selves,” but striving for perfection can be overwhelming and, frankly, exhausting. Rather than aiming for perfection, what if we allowed ourselves to be just “well-ish”? This idea isn’t about lowering standards – it’s about finding joy and meaning in what feels genuinely achievable. By embracing a “well-ish” approach, we can let go of pressure and create a holiday that is kind, balanced, and nourishing.

In this post, we’ll explore how to make “well-ish” your seasonal mantra and offer some gentle prompts and actions to help you feel grounded and at ease.

---

1. Reframe Wellbeing as “Good Enough”

Letting go of perfection can be challenging, especially when it comes to family gatherings, decor, and gift-giving. Yet setting realistic expectations can reduce stress and increase satisfaction. Accepting “good enough” doesn’t mean you don’t care – it simply means you’re focusing on what matters most to you this season.

Try This:

- Journal Prompt: “What does a ‘good enough’ holiday look like for me? What parts of the season can I enjoy without striving for perfection?”

- Gentle Action: Choose one holiday tradition and simplify it. For example, if cooking an elaborate dinner is daunting, consider a simpler menu or make it a potluck. Let the focus be on connection rather than presentation.

Letting go of perfect frees you to be present. By reframing “good enough” as a positive choice, you’re embracing a more intentional way to celebrate.

---

2. Small Wins for a Well-ish Holiday

Small, achievable actions can go a long way in creating a sense of well-being. The science behind positive psychology shows that small, manageable changes can significantly boost our mood and resilience, especially when we’re busy. Instead of big resolutions or overwhelming to-do lists, think about small wins that bring you a moment of joy or peace.

Try This:

- Journal Prompt: “What small action could bring me joy or calm today?”

- Gentle Action: Start a “small wins” list, noting one little thing each day that brings you joy, whether it’s taking a short walk, listening to your favourite song, or enjoying a hot drink without multitasking. These small wins build up over time, creating a sense of accomplishment and balance.

By focusing on small actions, you’ll find that well-being feels more accessible. This approach aligns with the “well-ish” mindset, making it easier to enjoy the season without feeling overwhelmed.

---

3. Give Yourself Permission to Be Imperfect

The holiday season can make us feel like everything should be “just so,” but aiming for perfection in every area can sap our energy and joy. Research on self-compassion shows that treating ourselves with kindness – especially when we’re not meeting ideal standards – can reduce anxiety and improve our emotional well-being. By embracing our imperfect selves, we allow for more authentic, meaningful experiences.

Try This:

- Journal Prompt: “Where am I being hard on myself this season? How can I bring more compassion to these areas?”

- Gentle Action: Practice a “self-compassion break.” When you catch yourself being overly self-critical, pause and ask: “What would I say to a friend in this situation?” Often, we’re much kinder to others than we are to ourselves, and shifting that perspective can help ease the pressure.

Embracing imperfection isn’t about giving up; it’s about recognising that our worth isn’t tied to doing things flawlessly. This shift makes room for real joy and connection.

---

Journal Prompts for a “Well-ish” Holiday

Here are three prompts to help you dive deeper into what a “well-ish” holiday means for you:

1. “What does a ‘well’ holiday feel like to me?”

- Describe what “well” means to you in the context of the holidays. Is it calm? Connected? Balanced? This prompt helps clarify your priorities and intentions.

2. “What expectations am I holding onto that I could release?”

- Reflect on traditions or pressures you feel obligated to follow. Do they bring joy, or are they simply habits? Identifying what you can let go of can free up space for what truly matters.

3. “What small moments bring me peace during the holiday season?”

- Think about moments that bring you a sense of calm – a morning coffee, a walk, or a favourite song. Recognising these moments can help you add intentional breaks to your days.

---

3 Gentle Actions to Embrace “Well-ish” This Season

If you’re ready to create a holiday that feels balanced and manageable, here are three actions to try:

1. Set a “Good Enough” Boundary:

- Choose one area where you’ll consciously decide to aim for “good enough” instead of perfection. Whether it’s holiday cards, decorating, or event planning, see if you can let go of some pressure.

2. Make a “Not To-Do” List:

- Just as powerful as a to-do list, a “not to-do” list helps you identify things you can skip this season. For example, if holiday baking feels like a chore, give yourself permission to buy cookies instead!

3. Focus on Feeling Intentions, Not “To-Do’s”:

- At the start of each week, pick one feeling you want to cultivate – such as “relaxed” or “connected.” Let that feeling guide your choices, helping you say “yes” to things that align with it and “no” to things that don’t.

---

Research Insights: Why Embracing “Well-ish” Can Improve Your Wellbeing

Studies from the field of positive psychology show that perfectionism is often linked with anxiety and burnout, particularly during high-stress periods like the holidays. According to Brené Brown, an expert in vulnerability and self-compassion, the drive for perfection can keep us disconnected from what truly matters and make us more self-critical.

By focusing on achievable goals and self-compassion, we support our mental and emotional well-being more sustainably. As Dr. Kristin Neff, a self-compassion researcher, says, self-kindness is a proven method for reducing stress and improving our ability to navigate life’s challenges. So by embracing “well-ish,” you’re not just making the season easier – you’re building resilience for the year ahead.

---

A Holiday Season That Feels Like “You”

This holiday season, give yourself permission to be “well-ish.” Rather than perfect, aim for a holiday that feels good enough – one that brings joy without adding stress. By letting go of expectations, focusing on small wins, and embracing your imperfect self, you create space for a more meaningful celebration.

If you’re ready for more gentle tips like these, sign up for our free Well-ish Guide to Feeling Better this Holiday Season. Discover simple ways to create a holiday season that truly feels like you.

Feeling Numb or Detached? Here’s How to Gently Reconnect with Yourself

If you’re reading this and feeling a sense of numbness, detachment, or even a deep exhaustion, know that you’re not alone. Right now, so many of us are feeling stretched thin, like we’re simply existing but not truly engaging with our lives. It’s easy to feel lost in this state, wondering why we’re not feeling the way we “should” or wishing we could just feel something.

Emotional numbness, detachment, and burnout are often responses to prolonged stress and overwhelm. Our minds and bodies are doing their best to protect us, even if it doesn’t always feel “helpful”.

Here are some gentle steps that can help us reconnect with ourselves, one small moment at a time.

1. Give Yourself Permission to Feel Exactly How You’re Feeling

It might seem counterintuitive, but the first step toward reconnecting with your emotions is often to give yourself permission to feel numb or detached. Remind yourself that it’s okay to feel this way, that numbness isn’t a “bad” feeling. Sometimes, simply acknowledging our current state is enough to start loosening its hold. Try saying to yourself: “I’m feeling numb right now, and that’s okay.”

2. Engage in Simple, Sensory Activities

When we’re numb or detached, it can help to focus on bringing ourselves back to the physical world. Small, sensory activities can reawaken that feeling of connection without overwhelming us. Try sitting with a cup of tea and noticing its warmth in your hands, going for a slow walk and listening to the sounds around you, or even splashing water on your face. These small acts remind us that we’re here, in the present moment, without forcing any big feelings.

3. Prioritise Rest Without Guilt

Burnout and emotional detachment often stem from overdoing or over-caring. Allow yourself to rest without any guilt or expectations. Sometimes, the very act of giving yourself a break—whether it’s a nap, a few minutes with a book, or an evening off from obligations (and the news)—can be the start of healing. Remember, rest isn’t a reward; it’s a necessity.

4. Connect with Others at Your Own Pace

When we feel numb or detached, connecting with others can feel like the last thing we want to do. However, gentle social connection can help us reconnect with our emotions in a safe, supportive way. If a full conversation feels too much, consider sending a quick message to a friend or sharing a quiet moment with a loved one. Small, low-pressure interactions can remind us of our place in the world.

Take it One Gentle Step at a Time

If you’re feeling numb, detached, or burned out, remember that you don’t need to “fix” anything right now. Instead, give yourself the grace to move through this season slowly, reconnecting with yourself in ways that feel light and manageable. Your emotions will return, bit by bit, and when they do, you’ll be ready to welcome them with compassion.

If you’re looking for more support in understanding and reconnecting with your emotions, consider booking an emotions coaching session with us. We’re here to meet you exactly where you are.

How to Feel Good Without Perfect: Simple Steps to a Kinder Holiday Season

With the holiday season approaching, many of us feel the pressure to make everything “just right.” Between the gatherings, gift-giving, and endless “to-do” lists, this time of year can bring both joy and stress. If the quest for perfection leaves you feeling more overwhelmed than content, it may be time to try a new approach.

Instead of aiming for a picture-perfect holiday, consider setting your sights on something kinder: simply feeling “well enough”. This shift is not about lowering standards; it’s about embracing what matters and letting go of what doesn’t.

Here, we’ll explore three simple ways to create a season that feels right for you, plus some journal prompts and gentle actions to help you connect to your own well-being.

---

1. Release the Holiday “Shoulds”

The holiday season is full of “shoulds”: we should send out perfectly coordinated holiday cards, bake all the desserts from scratch, and make sure every gift is wrapped with care. But who set these standards? Often, they’re a mix of societal expectations, family traditions, and our own internal pressures. Research suggests that releasing perfectionist tendencies, especially around the holidays, can reduce stress and lead to greater happiness

Try This:

- Journal Prompt: “What holiday traditions actually bring me joy? What expectations do I feel pressure to uphold, and why?”

- Gentle Action: Pick one “should” you feel attached to (like baking cookies from scratch or hosting a large gathering) and ask yourself if it truly brings you joy. If not, consider letting it go or simplifying it to suit your current needs.

When we question the holiday “shoulds” and focus on what feels genuine, we create space for a season that aligns with our real desires rather than external pressures. Remember, there’s no one right way to celebrate – only what feels right for you.

---

2. Permission to Pause

With all the activity and planning that comes with the holidays, it’s easy to lose sight of our own needs. But taking a small moment to pause can make all the difference. Research shows that small breaks throughout the day can significantly improve mood, focus, and overall well-being. Even a 5-minute pause can help reduce stress and reconnect you with yourself..

Try This:

- Journal Prompt: “How can I create moments of calm for myself this season? What would a short, meaningful pause look like for me?”

- Gentle Action: Practice a “holiday pause” by setting aside five minutes in your day to just breathe, enjoy a hot drink, or step outside. If a pause feels difficult to fit in, try integrating it into an existing activity, like focusing on your breath while waiting in line or slowing down during your evening routine.

These small pauses are powerful because they give us a chance to reconnect with ourselves amid the holiday bustle. Let this time be about you, free from any “shoulds” or “to-dos.”

---

3. Prioritise Feeling Over Doing

It’s tempting to overfill our calendars during the holidays, saying “yes” to every invitation, event, and tradition. But when we focus solely on “doing,” we can lose sight of how we actually want to feel. Do you want to feel relaxed, connected, or joyful this season? Let those feelings guide your choices.

Focusing on activities that support our desired emotions (rather than obligations) leads to greater life satisfaction. When we let our feelings, rather than activities, shape our holiday experience, we find a balance that aligns with our true well-being.

Try This:

- Journal Prompt: “How do I want to feel during the holiday season? What small choices or actions can support these feelings?”

- Gentle Action: Set an intention based on how you want to feel. For example, if you want to feel connected, consider inviting a friend for a casual coffee date. If relaxation is your priority, block off an afternoon to enjoy a quiet activity you love, like reading or crafting.

By prioritising feeling over doing, we can create a holiday season that resonates with who we truly are. This approach allows us to say “yes” to what matters and “no” to what doesn’t – without guilt.

---

Three Journal Prompts for a Kinder Holiday Season

Here are three journal prompts designed to help you dig deeper into what a “well enough” holiday could look like for you:

1. “What does a well holiday feel like to me?”

- Imagine your ideal holiday season. What stands out? What are you doing (or not doing) that makes it feel well? This prompt can help you identify specific actions or moments to bring into your season.

2. “What holiday expectations am I holding onto that I could release?”

- Often, we cling to traditions or expectations out of habit. Use this prompt to identify which of these serve you and which ones you might let go.

3. “What small moments can I add to my holiday routine to feel more balanced?”

- Small, daily rituals (like morning tea, evening journaling, or mindful walks) can help you stay grounded. Reflect on what these moments might look like for you.

---

Gentle Actions to Try

If you’re ready to make this season feel more balanced, here are three simple actions you can try:

1. Create a “Yes-No-Maybe” List:

Make a list of holiday activities and label them as “yes,” “no,” or “maybe.” Keep only the “yes” activities on your calendar and see if the “maybe” ones can become “no” if they feel too much.

2. Practice the “10-Minute Reset”:

Give yourself ten minutes each day to pause, reflect, and reset. This could be a quick walk, journaling, or simply sitting quietly. It’s a way to ground yourself in the midst of the holiday pace.

3. Set a “Feeling Intention” for Each Week:

Choose one feeling to focus on each week of the season, such as “peace,” “gratitude,” or “connection.” Make small choices that nurture this feeling in your life.

---

A Holiday Season That Feels Right for You

The holidays are a time for joy and connection, but they’re also an invitation to care for ourselves. By letting go of the “shoulds,” giving ourselves permission to pause, and focusing on how we want to feel, we can experience a season that’s kinder, calmer, and truly well.

If you’re ready for more ways to enjoy a well holiday season, sign up for our free Well-ish Guide to Feeling Better this Holiday Season. It’s packed with small, simple tips that help you focus on what really matters.

Feel Overwhelmed by the Holidays? Here’s a Guide to a Calmer Season

The holidays are a whirlwind—so much to do, so many people to see, and a thousand little things to keep up with. If the season feels more stressful than joyful, you’re not alone. Between shopping lists, holiday events, and the pressure to make everything “just right,” it’s no wonder that many of us feel like we’re barely holding it together. But what if this holiday season could feel different?

We’ve created something that might just help: The Holiday Well-Being Checklist, designed specifically for those of us who feel overwhelmed and stretched too thin this time of year. This checklist offers a simple, grounded approach to holiday self-care—real, practical steps that bring calm and joy back to your days.

---

The Pressure of Perfect Holidays

It’s easy to feel that the holidays should look a certain way, especially with all the “perfect” holiday scenes we see online. But reality often looks very different. For most of us, holidays come with a blend of joy and stress, connection and overwhelm. Between family dynamics, financial pressures, and the endless to-do list, it’s hard to find a moment to breathe.

Self-care during the holidays doesn’t have to be another “should” on your list—it can be a way to find peace amidst the chaos. Our checklist helps you make small shifts that bring back a sense of ease and enjoyment, without adding any pressure or perfectionism.

---

What’s Inside the Holiday Well-Being Checklist?

This isn’t your typical self-care list. The Holiday Well-Being Checklist is built to work with your real life, not against it. Each tip is about tuning into what feels good, letting go of stress where you can, and connecting with the moments that matter to you. Here are a few highlights:

• Set an Intention:

Start by choosing one word or feeling that you want to guide your season—something that speaks to how you want to feel, rather than what you think you “should” do.

• Choose What Brings Joy:

Curate your holiday influences. Follow accounts and content that inspire, uplift, and help you feel at ease, while letting go of anything that adds pressure or stress.

• Trust Your Needs:

Self-care doesn’t have to look a certain way. Our checklist encourages you to tune into what you actually need this season, whether that’s a moment of rest, a quiet evening, or a joyful connection.

• Embrace Imperfection:

The holiday season doesn’t need to be flawless to be meaningful. Our checklist reminds you that real moments are better than perfect ones.

---

Why This Checklist Can Make a Difference

You might wonder how a simple checklist can make a meaningful difference during such a busy season. But sometimes, the most powerful changes come from small, intentional steps. By signing up for The Holiday Well-Being Checklist, you’ll receive realistic, down-to-earth guidance that doesn’t ask you to overhaul your life—just gentle shifts that can bring in more ease and enjoyment.

---

Sign Up for the Holiday Well-Being Checklist

If you’re ready for a holiday season that feels more calm and grounded, The Holiday Well-Being Checklist is here to help. This guide is completely free, and it’s designed to bring a bit of real joy back to your holiday days.

Take a few minutes for yourself and sign up today to receive the checklist directly in your inbox. Let’s make this season a little kinder, simpler, and full of moments that feel truly good.

Everyday Retreats: Finding Your Way Back to Yourself

We all crave a break. We dream of having a space that is truly ours, where we can escape the demands of life for a little while. The reality is that most of us can’t jet off to a retreat whenever we need to recharge. But what if we didn’t have to? What if, instead, we could build those moments of pause into our everyday lives?

---

Can We Retreat Without Leaving Our Everyday Lives?

Imagine a retreat that fits seamlessly into your daily routine. No need for an exotic location or weeks of planning—just a small shift in how you approach your day, creating pockets of time that are just for you.

We’ve spent some time wondering how we can bring more of what we need—peace, connection, rest—into our daily lives. What if our days were sprinkled with tiny moments of retreat, so we could feel a little more like ourselves, even amidst the chaos?

---

5 Practical Ways to Design a Retreat That Fits Your Life

Today we’re exploring how you can create your Everyday Retreat that fits however imperfectly into your daily life. Think of it as a forgiving guide to help you create moments of rest and renewal in your everyday life:

1. Help others retreat too:

   
   Make it easier for someone else to find their own moments of peace. Maybe you pause before sending that group WhatsApp message, or you plan a casual potluck dinner instead of a high-pressure gathering. Take the pressure off, for yourself and for others.
   

2. Get playful:

   
   Your retreat doesn’t need to be serious or structured. Maybe it’s a cozy morning with coffee and a good podcast, or a solo walk in the park. Find what brings you joy and make it part of your everyday routine.

3. Define your limits:

   
   How much do you want to be in? Do you want to be fully immersed in rest, or take a scrappy adventure out into the world around you? Find your balance between solitude and exploration.

4. Solitude or social?

   
   Sometimes, retreating is about solitude. Other times, it’s about connecting with the right people. Decide where you want to place that balance, and don’t be afraid to change it based on what you need in the moment.

5. No ‘justs’ allowed:

   
   There’s no “just go for a run” or “just meditate” here. Your retreat should meet you where you are. It’s about what you need, not what someone else thinks is “right.”

---

Reclaim Moments of Calm in Your Everyday Routine

When you let go of the idea that you need a perfect retreat space or a week away to recharge, you open yourself up to the possibility of finding peace and connection in your everyday life. These small moments—whether spent alone or with others—can help you feel grounded and energized, even when life feels overwhelming.

Want to start building your Everyday Retreat? Join as a paid Substack Member and get access to this course from April 7 for free.

Finding Calm in the Chaos: Simple Self-Care for Busy Lives

When life’s demands keep piling up, it’s easy to lose sight of your own well-being. Whether it’s caring for family, managing work, or handling all those unexpected “must-do” tasks, many of us get caught in a cycle that leaves little space for ourselves. The result? A feeling of disconnection from what truly matters. At If Lost, we believe self-care doesn’t have to be complicated.

Today we wanted to share eight quick, manageable strategies that can help you reconnect with yourself, even in the busiest moments.

1. A Morning Pause for Yourself

Start the day with a Morning Pause: just five quiet minutes without screens or tasks, setting a simple intention for the day. This small practice creates a grounding moment before the day’s demands begin.

2. Journaling for Clarity

Dedicate 5-10 minutes to jot down what’s on your mind, letting thoughts flow freely. This quick reflection can help you process emotions, feel more centered, and gain insight into what you truly need.

3. A Nature Refresh

Spend a few moments outside—even just a short walk or sitting on the porch. Fresh air and a change of scenery can shift your perspective, clear mental fog, and bring a sense of calm.

4. Intentional Breath Breaks

Take a few seconds to close your eyes, breathe deeply, and let your shoulders relax. These quick “micro-breaks” throughout the day can recharge you, helping to ease tension and refocus your mind.

5. Simplified Self-Care Routines

Self-care doesn’t need to be elaborate. Choose one small thing each day that brings you joy, like listening to a favorite song, enjoying a cup of tea, or savoring a quiet moment. A single uplifting practice can often be enough to help you reset.

6. Mindful Transitions Between Tasks

Before diving into a new activity, pause for a few seconds to recognize the shift. This tiny habit helps you stay present and avoid feeling like your day is just one big, overwhelming blur.

7. Digital Boundaries for Peace of Mind

Set aside specific times for checking emails and messages rather than constantly checking in. Reducing digital overload helps reclaim your time and lessens the feeling of always being “on.”

8. Finding Support in Community

Whether through friends, a group, or a well-being workshop, connecting with others can boost your resilience and remind you that self-care doesn’t have to be solitary. A quick chat or shared experience can make a world of difference.

These small, everyday practices fit into even the busiest schedules, helping you reconnect with yourself without adding stress. Self-care can be simple and fulfilling—a small shift that brings more ease and joy to your life.

---

Want more simple, practical ways to reclaim your well-being?
Sign up for our newsletter and get Five Ways to a Better Well—a down-to-earth guide filled with easy tips to help you find balance, one small step at a time. Delivered straight to your inbox, it’s designed to bring more ease and calm to your everyday life.

Creating Space to Pause in Your Everyday Life

Everyone we talk to is exhausted—completely, overwhelmingly exhausted. Maybe it's the never-ending bad weather, or the pressure to do, be, and have everything at once. Maybe it’s the constant stream of notifications, the never-ending WhatsApp messages that make us feel like we might just break. Whatever the cause, we’re all longing for a pause.

We dream of running away, retreating to some far-flung destination where we can breathe deeply and reconnect with ourselves. But what if we could build that pause into our everyday lives, without booking a flight or waiting three months for a weekend away?

---

Why Wait for a Retreat? Finding Peace in Everyday Moments

For years, we’ve wondered how we can bring those feelings of peace and connection into our daily routines, so we don’t have to wait for a retreat to feel better. What if we could design our own “Everyday Retreat”—something that fits into our lives as they are, right now?

Imagine creating moments of rest and self-care, not just when life allows, but amid the daily chaos. You don’t need to wait for the perfect conditions. You can make this happen even after a hectic Monday and even in the darker months of the year.

Let’s start designing your Everyday Retreat today. Ready to join us?

---

5 Simple Ways to Create Your Own Everyday Retreat

Today we’re sharing part of our Manifesto for Your Everyday Retreat. Let it inspire you to find ways to make each day a little more restorative, starting now:

1. Make it your own:

   
   Whether it’s blasting your favorite song or doing a quick workout, design your retreat around what makes you feel good. This is your time—use it to bring a little joy into your day.
   
   

2. Hit key well-being areas:

   
   Yes, yoga and mindfulness are great, but don’t forget to spark your creativity or nurture your emotional health by reaching out to friends. Retreats are more than just relaxation—they’re about paying attention to often neglected areas of our lives.
   
   

3. Know your tone:

   
   Is your retreat cozy and comforting with tea and blankets, or energizing with fresh juice and movement? Tailor the vibe to what you need in the moment.

4. Prep your retreat, but don’t get stuck there:

   
   Clear a small space for yourself—a corner of the room or even just your favorite chair. But remember, it doesn’t need to be perfect. You don’t need an Instagram-worthy setup; you just need a place where you can pause and reconnect with yourself.
   
   

5. Set boundaries:

   
   Even though your retreat is happening in your everyday life, you still need to create space for it. Set a boundary with those around you. Put up a metaphorical “do not disturb” sign so you can truly step away and be present.

---

Feel Calm and Connected—Without the Need for a Getaway

An Everyday Retreat doesn’t need to be a big production—it can be as simple as carving out a few minutes to breathe, move, or listen to something that lifts your spirits. When you make small moments like these a regular part of your life, it’s like creating a well of calm that you can draw from whenever you need it.

Ready to build more of these restorative moments into your day?

Want to start building your Everyday Retreat? Join as a paid Substack Member and get access to this course from April 7 for free.

Overcoming Fear: 3 Practical Strategies to Improve Your Emotional Wellbeing

Fear is an emotion we often try to avoid, but it tends to sneak into our everyday lives when we least expect it. Whether it’s triggered by external events or internal worries, fear can easily make us feel anxious, stuck, or overwhelmed.

---

How Fear Sneaks Into Our Everyday Lives

Fear can show up in many ways. It might be as big as eco-anxiety, political concerns, or worries about rising living costs. Other times, it’s more personal—like feeling nervous about attending a social event alone or trying a new activity.

Fear is a master of disguise. It hides in unexpected places:

• Stuck in a job you don’t love? That’s fear of change.

• Hesitating to take on a new opportunity? Maybe it’s fear of success—or failure.

• Waking up at 2 a.m., stressing over details? You might be dealing with fear of imperfection or getting things wrong.

• Holding back in conversations? Fear of judgment or ridicule is likely at play.

• Not daring to dream bigger? You could be dealing with fear of loss or failure.

Fear can also show up subtly, making you feel like you’re not enough or that you’re doing life wrong. It can float in the background, silently influencing your decisions and keeping you from taking action.

---

The Real Problem with Fear: It Keeps Us Stuck

Fear often gets in the way, blocking progress and making us feel small. It can loop in our thoughts, reinforcing old beliefs and trapping us in cycles of doubt and hesitation. Over time, we can become so used to living with fear that we don’t even realize how it’s limiting our lives.

But what if we could learn to understand fear, work with it, and ask it to step aside when needed?

---

How to Have a Better Relationship with Fear

Fear doesn’t have to control your life. By changing how you relate to fear, you can regain a sense of freedom and confidence. Here are three practical strategies to help you build a healthier relationship with fear:

1. Name Your Fear

One of the most effective ways to deal with fear is to get specific about what you’re feeling. Fear can take many forms, and naming it gives you clarity about why it’s showing up.

For example, ask yourself:

• Is this fear related to anxiety or feeling overwhelmed?

• Is it a fear of failure tied to feelings of inadequacy?

• Is it fear of judgment that stems from concerns about imperfection?

When you can pinpoint the exact nature of your fear, you can address it more effectively. Naming your fear helps you stop it from silently influencing your actions and allows you to confront it directly.

2. Put Distance Between Yourself and the Emotion

You are not your fear. There’s a powerful difference between saying, “I am afraid” and “I am feeling afraid.” This small shift in language creates space between you and the emotion, giving you more control over how you respond to it.

Try this exercise: Picture your fear as a temporary place you can visit. Ask yourself, “What happens when I enter that space? How long do I need to stay there, and what might happen if I choose to leave?” By visualizing fear as something you can interact with, rather than something that controls you, you give yourself more freedom to move beyond it.

3. Get Comfortable with Feeling Uncomfortable

Courage doesn’t mean the absence of fear—it means taking action despite it. Fear will never fully disappear, but by learning to sit with it and move through it, you can grow your confidence.

Ask yourself: “What would happen if I embraced this discomfort? What can I learn from it?” Start small—speak up in a meeting, try something new, or take a chance you’ve been putting off. The more you practice facing fear, the less hold it will have over you.

---

Ready to Face Your Fears?

Fear can feel overwhelming, but it doesn’t have to dictate your life. By naming your fear, creating distance from it, and getting comfortable with discomfort, you can build a better relationship with this powerful emotion.

Instead of letting fear hold you back, you can learn to work with it—stepping into a life that feels a whole lot freer.

---

Ready to shift your relationship with fear in your life? Emotions coaching can help you explore your fears, understand why they show up and find practical ways to move forward with confidence. Let’s work together to create a life where fear no longer holds you back.

Start your journey to better emotional wellbeing with a free discovery call today

42 Acres

Go here if: You’re looking to get into nature, reawaken your deep-rooted instincts and nourish yourself.

What is it: Set over 173 acres of wild land and ancient forest, 42 Acres is a regenerative estate and nature reserve where you can reconnect with nature, yourself and others.

Explore the self-guided and led retreats, often in partnership with world-renowned practitioners and aligned with nature, that encourage you to dream, grow, learn and rest. Stay in a restored 13th-century former hermitage, converted barge or under the stars in a luxury bell tent. Swim in the lake, meditate in the treehouse, sauna in the woods and nourish yourself with food grown on the land.

Why you need it: 42 Acres was first conceived in 2015 by siblings Lara and Seth Tabatznik as a home for personal, social and environmental change after having been deeply inspired by some powerful personal retreats and workshops in their own lives. Both Seth and Lara are strong advocates that outer change in the world starts with the self, or to quote Gandhi: “Be the change that you wish to see in the world”.

What they offer: At its core, 42 Acres invites people to reconnect with nature, self and others but has now grown to offer so much more including a range of wellbeing and nature-based experiences and events, a regenerative farm and an abundant nature reserve.

What makes it different: Living within an ancient forest, host to a variety of wild meadows and vast open fields and the source of four different rivers within a stone’s throw, this is a place for planting your dreams.

What you need to know: You can visit 42 Acres in several ways — as a guest on a day experience, workshop or energy exchange or by visiting them on retreat. All booked guests are free to roam the estate, swim in the lake and explore. Food, accommodation and experiences need to be pre-booked on their website.

In their own words:

“Our vision is to grow and consume in a way that serves the health of people and the planet. Our market gardens and regenerative farm use and permaculture and biodynamic-inspired principles. We grow, forage and wild-tend to create wholesome, nutrient-dense food. As we cultivate and restore health in our earth, we restore the worlds within ourselves.

We use our deepest intuition, ancient tools and shared knowledge to establish regenerative spaces, curate transformational experiences, and foster opportunities to learn, heal and grow.”

---

 

42 Acres is a 173 -acre retreat centre, regenerative estate and nature reserve in Witham Friary, just outside of Frome, Somerset

Website | Social Media

All images courtesy of 42 Acres.

---

The Benefits of Journaling: How to Start (and Stick With) a Journaling Practice for Better Wellbeing

Feeling lost in the chaos of daily life? Maybe you’ve heard that journaling can help you slow down and tune in, but you’re not quite sure how to get started. Or maybe you’ve started a journal once or twice, only to abandon it after a week of blank pages staring back at you. Wherever you’re at, journaling can be a simple, meaningful way to bring clarity, calm, and connection into your life—if you know how to make it work for you.

Discover How Journaling Can Help You Find Clarity and Calm in Everyday Life

Journaling has long been celebrated as a powerful tool for mental and emotional well-being. But what if it could be more than that? Not just a place to vent or reflect, but a daily practice that helps you make sense of the world around you, and more importantly, your own needs and desires.

At If Lost, we’ve seen firsthand how a journaling practice can bring relief from the constant noise of life. By putting pen to paper, you create space to reconnect with yourself. No judgment, no pressure—just an honest exploration of where you’re at and where you want to go.

It doesn’t have to be complicated. The key is to start small and keep it simple. Once you get past the idea that journaling has to look a certain way, you can discover how it helps you tap into your voice, gain clarity, and feel a little more grounded in your everyday life.

---

How to Start—and Stick With—a Journaling Practice

Ready to start? Here’s how you can begin and maintain a journaling practice, no matter how busy life feels. Plus, we’re sharing 5 easy journaling prompts that will help you improve your everyday well-being.

1. Start where you are

The biggest barrier to journaling is often thinking it has to be perfect. It doesn’t! There’s no ‘right way’ to journal. You don’t need a fancy notebook or an hour of quiet time. Grab whatever you have on hand and start writing. The key is simply to start.

2. Make it easy and doable

If journaling every day feels like too much, aim for once or twice a week. Set aside 5–10 minutes at a time that works for you—whether that’s over your morning coffee, during lunch, or right before bed. The goal is to make journaling part of your routine, but without pressure.

3. Let go of expectations

Some days, your journaling will feel insightful and deep. Other days, it might feel scattered or surface-level—and that’s okay! The process is about showing up for yourself, not writing something profound every time.

4. Experiment with what works for you

You don’t have to stick to one style of journaling. Some days, you might prefer stream-of-consciousness writing. On other days, you might enjoy responding to specific prompts or focusing on gratitude. Give yourself permission to explore what feels right on any given day.

5. Keep going, even if it’s not ‘perfect’

Journaling is a long-term practice, not a quick fix. You might miss a day or a week—that’s normal! Just pick up where you left off. Consistency will build over time, and you’ll start to see the benefits in how you feel and navigate your days.

---

5 Journaling Prompts for Everyday Wellbeing

Not sure what to write about? These simple prompts can help you get started:

1. What’s one thing I’m grateful for today?

Starting with gratitude can instantly shift your mindset, helping you focus on what’s going well—even if it’s something small.

2. How am I feeling right now?

This is a great check-in prompt to help you notice and acknowledge your emotions, without needing to ‘fix’ them.

3. What’s one thing I can let go of today?

Whether it’s a worry, a task, or a feeling, writing about what you can release helps you focus on what really matters.

4. What’s one thing I want to create more space for in my life?

This prompt encourages you to think about what you need—whether it’s more rest, joy, or time with loved ones.

5. What do I want my day to feel like?

Journaling about your intentions for the day can help you feel more purposeful and grounded, even amidst life’s chaos.

---

Reconnect with Yourself: The Benefits of Journaling for Better Mental and Emotional Health

By weaving journaling into your everyday routine, you’ll notice how it helps you slow down, reconnect with yourself, and navigate life’s challenges with more clarity. It’s a tool you can return to whenever you need it—whether you’re feeling lost or simply want to stay connected with yourself.

Curious to try journaling? Join our Everyday Retreat on Substack, where we offer weekly journaling and writing prompts for better wellbeing.

Feeling Lost in Midlife? How Embracing Uncertainty Can Lead to Growth

Midlife often brings a swirl of emotions and questions. You may find yourself feeling adrift, unsure of what comes next, or even questioning decisions you once felt confident about. While it’s natural to want clarity and certainty, there’s also something powerful in embracing the uncertainty that midlife can bring. This time of life can be more than just a period of doubt—it can become a generative space for self-discovery and growth.

---

Midlife and the Big Questions: Why Feeling Uncertain Isn’t a Bad Thing

Many women enter midlife with a sense that things are shifting beneath their feet. Relationships change, careers evolve, children grow up, and what once felt solid may now feel uncertain. It’s common to ask yourself: “Am I on the right path? What do I truly want moving forward?” The truth is that uncertainty is part of midlife. But what if, instead of resisting it, we could lean into the uncertainty and use it to spark new perspectives?

Uncertainty doesn’t have to mean that something’s wrong. Sometimes, it’s the space between where you’ve been and where you’re going that allows for the most profound transformation. By sitting with the questions, you’re opening the door to new possibilities that might have been hidden if everything stayed the same.

---

5 Ways to Navigate Uncertainty in Midlife

If you’re feeling lost or uncertain during this phase of life, know that it’s completely normal—and that it can be a turning point for learning. Here are five things you can try to navigate these feelings and start making the most of this time:

1. Pause and Reflect

Give yourself permission to slow down. Take time to reflect on where you are right now without rushing to find all the answers. Journaling, meditating, or even taking mindful walks can help you connect with your deeper thoughts and feelings. Often, clarity comes from creating space to simply be.

2. Reframe Uncertainty as Opportunity

Instead of seeing uncertainty as something to fear, try reframing it as an opportunity. When things are open-ended, you have the chance to explore new paths, ideas, and desires. What do you want to learn about yourself during this time? What’s something new you’d like to try? Curiosity can lead to growth.

3. Reconnect with Your Values

Midlife is an ideal time to revisit your core values. Sometimes the disconnect we feel comes from living a life that no longer aligns with what we deeply care about. Spend some time identifying what matters most to you now, and let those values guide your next steps.

4. Seek Connection

You’re not alone in feeling uncertain and speaking with others who are going through the same thing can be incredibly grounding. Whether it’s joining a community, engaging with friends, or working with a coach, talking through your feelings helps you see new perspectives and feel supported.

5. Take Small, Purposeful Steps

If the idea of big life changes feels overwhelming, start small. You don’t have to figure it all out at once. Focus on making small, purposeful changes that feel right to you—whether that’s carving out time for self-care, trying a new hobby, or adjusting your daily routine to better suit your needs.

---

Leaning into Uncertainty Can Lead to Greater Fulfillment

By embracing the questions, the doubts, and the unknowns, you give yourself space to grow. Midlife is a time of change, but it’s also a time of possibility. As you explore this phase, remember that it’s okay to not have everything figured out. In fact, it’s often the uncertainty that leads to new insights, fresh ideas, and a life that feels more aligned with who you are now.

---

Ready to Explore What’s Next? Let’s Navigate Midlife Together

If you’re feeling lost in midlife, coaching can provide the guidance and support you need to turn uncertainty into possibility. In 1:1 sessions, we’ll work together to uncover what truly matters to you, develop strategies for navigating this time, and create a plan that feels aligned with your values.

Book a free call today to start rediscovering yourself in midlife and shape the next chapter of your life with confidence.

Let’s Get Started!

---

If you’re local to Bath, check our Events Page for in-person midlife emotions coaching at either the Somerset Rooms or SoulSpa.

---

Midlife is a time of change—let’s make it a time of possibility. Sign up for our mailing list to receive insights, tools, and guidance to help you navigate midlife with more clarity, confidence, and ease. Because this chapter is yours to shape. Join us here

Less Stress, More Care: Tailor Self-Care to Your Real Life

Does it ever feel like self-care has become just another to-do list item?

Between “perfect morning routines,” endless lists of self-care must-dos, and the latest wellness trends, it’s easy to get overwhelmed. Instead of feeling better, you might find yourself feeling more exhausted.

But what if self-care could actually be about less? Less pressure, less perfection, and more about what genuinely supports you?

---

Why Self-Care Feels Like Another Task on Your To-Do List

Everywhere you look, there’s advice on how to meditate better, eat cleaner, or optimize your downtime. We’re bombarded by messages about self-care that often seem to suggest we need to add more things to our already busy lives. The result? Many of us feel like we’re failing at self-care. Instead of feeling relaxed and rejuvenated, we’re left stressed out and exhausted, wondering if we’re doing it all wrong.

But self-care isn’t supposed to be another area where you feel like you need to excel. It’s about supporting yourself in a way that feels right for you. It’s time to rethink self-care, moving beyond the latest trends and finding what truly helps you reconnect, recharge, and feel good.

---

How to Make Self-Care Yours—And Actually Enjoy It

How do we do that? By shifting from a one-size-fits-all approach to a personalized one. These five practices will help you make self-care yours, focusing on what genuinely fits your life and needs.

1. Identify Your “Non-Negotiables”

What are the small actions that make a big difference in your day? Maybe it’s your morning cup of coffee, a quiet walk, or five minutes of stretching. By figuring out the few things that you genuinely need to feel good, you can prioritize them no matter how busy your day gets. Your non-negotiables are the anchors that keep you steady, even when everything else is chaotic.

2. Create a ‘Done for Today’ Ritual

We’re often caught up in a cycle of constant productivity, but self-care can start with the simple act of letting go. Establish a small ritual to mark the end of your workday, whether it’s turning off your computer, lighting a candle, or putting on your favorite music. By creating a boundary between your work and personal time, you give yourself permission to relax and unwind without guilt.

3. Experiment with Micro-Moments of Self-Care

Self-care doesn’t have to be a grand gesture. It can be as simple as taking a deep breath, stepping outside for a minute, or savoring a piece of chocolate. Think of it as sprinkling little moments of care throughout your day rather than waiting for a big break. These micro-moments can be powerful ways to reset and recharge, especially when you don’t have time for a full routine.

4. Embrace the Power of Saying “No”

Sometimes the best self-care is knowing when to set boundaries. If you’re someone who often says yes to others, start practicing the power of a gentle “no.” Declining an extra project, skipping an event, or simply carving out time for yourself is not selfish—it’s essential. By saying no to what drains you, you’re saying yes to your well-being.

5. Revisit an Old Hobby or Passion

Self-care can also be about reconnecting with things you once loved but have set aside. Whether it’s painting, gardening, reading, or playing an instrument, revisiting an old hobby can bring a sense of joy and fulfillment. It’s a reminder that self-care is not just about maintaining your well-being but also about nourishing your passions and interests.

---

There’s No ‘Right’ Way to Self-Care—Only What Feels Right to You

Self-care shouldn’t be a source of stress. It could be a way to bring a little more joy, ease, and connection into your life. By identifying your non-negotiables, creating rituals, embracing micro-moments, learning to say no, and revisiting old passions, you can create a self-care practice that feels authentic, attainable, and genuinely helpful.

There’s no right or wrong way to do it—just your way. So, how will you make self-care yours today?

---

Ready to Make Self-Care Simple?

Sign up for our free guide, 5 Ways to a Better Well, and discover easy, practical tips to boost your well-being every day. Get started on your journey to feeling better, one step at a time.

Reconnect with Nature: Simple Ways to Boost Mental Wellbeing

In a world that moves fast, it’s easy to feel out of sync—with ourselves, our surroundings, even our emotions. But there’s a simple, powerful way to start reconnecting today, and it doesn’t require special gear, a trip to a national park, or hours of free time. It starts with nature—right outside your door.

---

How I Reconnected Without Leaving My Neighborhood

When I first realized how disconnected I felt, I thought the solution needed to be a grand adventure—maybe camping in the wild or a mountain hike. But with work, family, and life all pulling at me, those ideas felt impossible.

Instead, I started small. I began noticing the little things: the tree I passed every morning on my walk, the way the sunset painted the sky as I washed the dishes, the flowers peeking through cracks in the sidewalk. These weren’t dramatic moments, but they were enough to start feeling a little more connected—not just to nature, but to myself.

It turns out, nature doesn’t have to be a grand expedition. It can be as simple as sitting on a park bench, feeling the wind on your face, or watching birds from your window. And the benefits are real and measurable.

Studies show that just a few minutes of exposure to nature can reduce stress, improve mood, and increase feelings of wellbeing. You don’t need to be an “outdoorsy” person to access these benefits—you just need to start noticing.

---

Nature is Closer Than You Think: Tuning Into Your Surroundings

So, how can you start reconnecting? Begin by expanding what nature means to you. It’s not just national parks or forests; it’s your local park, your backyard, that tree outside your office, or even the view from your window.

Nature is everywhere, waiting to be part of your everyday life. And when you let it in, you’ll find yourself grounding more deeply in the present, feeling more balanced, and yes—more connected.

Instead of feeling overwhelmed and scattered, you could find peace in a simple morning walk, or clarity by taking a moment to watch the clouds drift by. These are small steps, but they make a big difference.

---

Reconnect and Revive: Bringing Nature into Your Daily Life

What if feeling connected didn’t require major life changes or extra hours in the day? What if it’s simply about learning how to see what’s already around you? By bringing nature into your everyday routine, you can start feeling more in tune with yourself, your surroundings, and your emotions—without the pressure of doing it “right” or “big.”

If this resonates, consider joining our upcoming workshop, Seasonal Shifts: Enhancing Your Wellbeing Inspired by Nature. In this 90-minute session, you’ll explore how the rhythms of nature can support your mental and emotional wellbeing—no hiking boots required. We’ll dive into simple, science-backed strategies that help you reconnect with the natural world, even in small, everyday ways.

Let’s rediscover the connection you’ve been missing. Book your spot in the workshop and start your journey toward feeling more grounded, balanced, and whole.

How to Create an Everyday Retreat at Home: 8 Simple Ways to Take a Break

Feeling overwhelmed? The idea of escaping to a retreat sounds dreamy, but what if you don’t have the time or money to whisk yourself away for a week of relaxation?

At If Lost, we believe that you don’t need to leave your home to experience the benefits of a retreat. With a few intentional changes, you can create a retreat-like atmosphere in your own space, giving yourself daily moments of calm and connection. Today we’ll be exploring 8 simple ways to turn your home into your personal sanctuary.

---

Why Everyday Retreats Matter More Than Big Escapes

We all crave breaks from the daily grind, especially when life feels overwhelming. Traditional retreats offer a space to reset, but they’re not always practical. That’s why creating an everyday retreat at home can be so powerful—it fits into your routine, is accessible anytime you need it, and helps you find moments of ease in your daily routine.

Here’s how you can build small daily practices that allow you to recharge, reconnect, and retreat into a calm mindset no matter where you are.

1. Morning Mindfulness

Start your day with intention. Set aside 5–10 minutes for a simple morning ritual that grounds you before you dive into your day. It could be as simple as sitting with your favorite drink in silence, focusing on your breath, or doing a quick body scan to check in with how you’re feeling. This small practice can set the tone for the rest of the day.

2. Designate a Calm Corner

Carve out a small space in your home that feels calming—whether it’s a cozy chair by a window, a corner of your bedroom, or even just a spot on your couch. This is your “retreat corner,” a place where you can go to decompress. Make it comfy with a soft blanket, candles, or anything that brings you a sense of peace.

3. Take Mini Breaks Throughout the Day

You don’t need to wait for a big moment to relax. Build small breaks into your day—a 5-minute stretch, stepping outside for fresh air, or just closing your eyes for a moment of quiet. These tiny pauses help prevent overwhelm and keep you grounded as the day unfolds.

4. Disconnect from Technology

One of the best parts of traditional retreats is the chance to step away from the constant noise of technology. Set aside intentional tech-free moments throughout the day, whether it’s turning your phone on airplane mode during meals or setting a timer for an hour of screen-free time in the evening.

5. Connect with Nature

Even if you can’t leave your home, you can still enjoy the calming effects of nature. Open a window, tend to a houseplant, or sit outside for a few minutes. If you have the time, take a walk in a nearby park or simply sit on your porch to enjoy the fresh air. Nature has a way of grounding us, even in the smallest doses.

6. Create a Sensory Experience

Activate your senses to create a calming atmosphere. Light a candle with your favorite scent, play soft music, or enjoy a warm cup of tea. When you focus on sensory details, it helps pull your attention away from worries and back into the present moment.

7. Journaling for Reflection

End your day with a journaling practice. Take 5 minutes before bed to reflect on your thoughts and feelings from the day. Jot down three things you’re grateful for, or use this time to check in with yourself emotionally. It’s a small but powerful way to release tension and process your day.

8. Practice Self-Compassion

Perhaps the most important part of creating an everyday retreat is allowing yourself the grace to take a break, even on the busiest days. Let go of guilt or the need to be “productive” at every moment. Retreating into calm is a form of self-care, and it’s okay to prioritize your wellbeing.

---

The Possibility of Everyday Retreats

Creating an everyday retreat at home is all about small, mindful practices that allow you to step back, even if it’s just for a few minutes. These tiny moments of calm can have a big impact on how you navigate your day and respond to overwhelming situations.

Sign Up for the Everyday Retreat: A Live 4-Week Course for Wellbeing

If you’re ready to dive deeper into these practices and want extra support, join us for the Everyday Retreat, our live, 4-week online course. In just 10 minutes a day, you’ll learn to integrate retreat-like practices into your everyday life, alongside a community of like-minded individuals. You’ll also get access to weekly live meet-ups where we’ll share, reflect, and support one another.

Give yourself the break you deserve, right from the comfort of your home. Want to start building your Everyday Retreat? Join as a paid Substack Member and get access to this course from April 7 for free.

Finding Purpose: The Story Behind If Lost Start Here

Have you ever felt like you’re trying to navigate life without a map? Maybe you’ve been searching for answers, or just a simple sense of direction in a world that feels more chaotic by the day.

We get it—because we’ve been there too. That’s why we built this company, not just for ourselves, but for you, and anyone else feeling lost and looking for guidance.

---

What began as a deeply personal vow to help others has grown into a company with a big social mission.

It all began with a promise. Claire, one of our co-founders, had just dropped her mum off at yet another mental health ward. Her mum’s long struggle with clinical depression and anxiety had reached a point where Claire felt powerless to help. But in that moment of deep frustration and sadness, she made a vow: if she couldn’t fix things for her own mum, then she would do everything in her power to help others who felt equally lost.

That personal story is at the heart of If Lost Start Here—a wellbeing company that stands for much more than just offering advice or selling products. We exist because, like so many others, we know what it’s like to be overwhelmed by life’s challenges, and we wanted to create a place where people could start finding their way back to themselves.

---

Our mission is rooted in five reasons—five guiding ‘whys’ that shape everything we do

Simon Sinek talks about finding your 'why'—the core purpose that drives everything you do. For us, that purpose is crystal clear. Every action we take, every product we develop, is rooted in five fundamental reasons:

1. Because Claire promised to help.

After that heartbreaking day at the psychiatric ward, she knew she had to create something that would offer real, meaningful support for those who feel lost.

2. Because we’re tired of the noise.

In today’s world, we’re bombarded with messages about how we need to change, improve, and be 'better' versions of ourselves. But sometimes, what we really need is to just accept ourselves as we are—and tune out the noise.

3. Because support matters.

We believe that to be truly self-guided, we also need collective support. Community and connection aren’t just nice-to-haves; they’re essential.

4. Because where we live matters.

Our environment—both the physical world around us and the inner world within us—shapes who we are. Exploring both is key to our wellbeing.

5. Because we follow curiosity.

We’re on a constant journey, always asking questions, always seeking new ways to support our community. Curiosity is the engine that drives us forward.

---

From feeling overwhelmed to feeling supported—If Lost Start Here is about helping you find your way

At If Lost Start Here, we don’t just want to inspire you—we want to help you take real steps toward a better life. Our purpose is to guide you from feeling overwhelmed to feeling supported, from feeling lost to finding your way.

Whether you’re new to us or have been with us for a while, we’re committed to walking alongside you on this journey of self-discovery and wellbeing. We invite you to explore more on our website, sign up for our Well-ish newsletter, and let curiosity guide you, just as it does for us.

Let’s Get Started.

---

Feeling lost in the world of wellness? Join our Well-ish newsletter for monthly insights, tips, and real stories to help guide you back to yourself. Sign up today and get our latest edition straight to your inbox!

What if fear wasn’t something to avoid, but something to face head-on?

Fear. We all feel it. It can sneak in when we’re making big decisions, or it can hold us back from doing something small but important in our everyday lives. But what if, instead of letting fear stop us, we could use it as a guide to grow, learn, and take action?

---

How fear sneaks into our everyday lives

Fear isn’t just reserved for haunted houses or scary movies. It shows up in so many different ways in our day-to-day lives:

• When you’re about to have a difficult conversation, and you feel your heart race.

• When you’re considering a career change but hesitate, unsure of the outcome.

• When you’re standing on the edge of an opportunity, but self-doubt whispers, “What if I fail?”

We all know what it feels like to be held back by fear. Sometimes, fear is rooted in real danger, but more often than not, it’s rooted in uncertainty. Fear of failure, fear of judgment, fear of the unknown – all of these can make us feel stuck, like we’re walking through life with invisible chains.

And while fear is universal, the way it impacts our individual lives can be deeply personal.

---

Turn fear into action: Here’s how

The good news? Fear doesn’t have to be your enemy. In fact, by understanding and facing it, you can reclaim your power and move forward. Fear is often a signal – it’s pointing you toward something important, something you need to confront, something that, once you handle, will lead to growth.

So, how can you start to face your fears? Here are five actionable strategies to help you do just that:

1. Name your fear

The first step in facing fear is to acknowledge it. Don’t push it down or pretend it doesn’t exist. When you name your fear out loud (or even write it down), it becomes more manageable. For example, “I’m afraid of failing this project” is much easier to address than a vague sense of anxiety. Naming it takes away some of its power.

2. Break it down

Fear often feels overwhelming because we see the whole picture all at once. If you’re afraid of a big decision or action, break it down into smaller, manageable steps. Afraid of public speaking? Start by talking in small groups. Afraid of making a career change? Break the process into research, networking, and then decision-making. Each small step you take lessens the grip of fear.

3. Challenge your thoughts

Fear often comes from irrational or exaggerated thoughts. Ask yourself, “What’s the worst that could happen?” and then challenge that thought with evidence. For example, if you’re afraid of failing an interview, remind yourself of past successes. Get into the habit of questioning fearful thoughts and replacing them with more balanced perspectives.

4. Practice exposure

The best way to overcome fear is to face it. Start small and build up to the bigger things that scare you. If you’re afraid of putting your work out there, start by sharing it with a trusted friend. If you’re nervous about trying a new hobby, dip your toe in with a class or tutorial. Gradually exposing yourself to the things that scare you helps you build confidence over time.

5. Reframe fear as growth

Instead of seeing fear as something negative, start seeing it as a sign of growth. When you feel fear, it’s because you’re stepping outside your comfort zone, and that’s where the magic happens. Every time you face fear, you’re strengthening your resilience. Remind yourself: “If I’m feeling fear, it’s because I’m on the edge of something new.”

---

How facing fear unlocks new possibilities

Facing fear is never easy, but it’s always worth it. Fear might never fully go away, but with the right tools, it can become something you manage, rather than something that manages you. When you understand your fear, break it down, and step toward it, you unlock new possibilities in your life. You grow, you learn, and you become braver every day.

---

Ready to take that first step?

Join us for a FREE interactive workshop where we’ll explore how fear is holding you back and give you the tools to move through it.

Sign up for the Brave Enough workshop today and take control of your future!

Do you feel disconnected from your own emotions?

You’re not alone if you find yourself feeling distant from your own feelings. Many of us have learned to avoid emotions as a way to cope—maybe it seemed safer, or maybe it just felt easier to ignore them than face them head-on. But over time, this can lead to a sense of numbness, like you’re cut off from yourself. It might even feel like you’re just going through the motions, without any real connection to your inner life.

---

Learning to block emotions out

According to Zoe Hawkins and Jo Wheatley, emotional stonewalling can become a natural response when we believe our feelings are too overwhelming or simply not worth acknowledging. It’s like building an invisible wall to protect ourselves from discomfort. The wall keeps us from feeling the heavy stuff—like sadness, fear, or anger—but it also keeps us from feeling the good things, like joy, connection, or peace.

Maybe you’ve told yourself that emotions just get in the way of being productive, or perhaps you grew up in an environment where expressing feelings wasn’t encouraged. Over time, avoiding emotions can become second nature. You push feelings aside, focus on getting things done, and ignore the subtle signals your body gives you. You might even feel like you don’t have any emotions at all—until one day they overwhelm you, and it feels like everything comes rushing in at once. It’s exhausting, isolating, and leaves you feeling like you’ve lost control.

---

What if there was another way to feel?

Imagine what it would be like if you could start gently lowering that wall. Not tearing it down all at once, but slowly creating space for yourself to feel—at your own pace, without fear. It’s possible to reconnect with your emotions in a way that feels safe and manageable. Instead of being overwhelmed, you could learn to accept emotions as they come, understanding them without letting them control you.

Reconnecting with your emotions doesn’t have to mean diving into deep waters all at once. It’s about small moments—like pausing to check in with yourself during the day, letting yourself experience how you feel, and learning that emotions are just part of being human. In fact, allowing yourself to feel can help you build deeper connections with others, feel more in control of your choices, and even experience greater joy in everyday moments.

---

Three strategies to reconnect with your emotions

Name Your Feelings Without Judgment

A simple yet powerful way to begin reconnecting with your emotions is by naming them. When you feel something—whether it’s frustration, sadness, joy, or something else—try to pause and say it to yourself: “I feel [emotion].”

This helps you become more aware of what you’re experiencing without judging yourself for it.

Remember, there’s no “wrong” emotion to feel—each one is just part of your experience in that moment.

Practice Body Awareness

Emotions don’t just live in your mind—they also show up in your body. Take a moment during the day to notice how your body feels. Are your shoulders tense? Is your stomach in knots?

When you start to recognize where emotions manifest physically, it becomes easier to identify and acknowledge them. Try a simple body scan, starting from your head and moving to your toes, noticing any sensations.

This gentle practice can help you reconnect with your feelings by tuning into how your body is reacting.

Journal for Five Minutes a Day

Writing can be a powerful tool for exploring emotions. Set aside just five minutes each day to write down how you’re feeling. It doesn’t need to be perfect or even make sense—just let your thoughts flow.

Journaling helps you release emotions you might not even realize you’re holding onto, and it creates a safe space for you to be honest with yourself.

Over time, this practice can help you feel more comfortable acknowledging and processing your emotions.

---

Taking the First Steps Toward Emotional Reconnection

It’s okay if reconnecting with your emotions feels intimidating. After all, you’ve built these walls for a reason, and they’ve protected you in many ways. But now, you can begin to learn that emotions aren’t something to fear—they’re a part of you, and by allowing them in, you’re taking an important step toward living a fuller life.

What might change if you started to gently accept your feelings instead of pushing them away? Imagine being able to name how you feel without judgment, to understand your emotions without fear, and to experience deeper relationships—both with yourself and with others. You can begin to feel again, one step at a time, in a way that works for you.

If you’re ready to begin lowering those emotional walls, our ‘Feel Again’ one-on-one coaching sessions are here to support you.

This October, take the first step toward reconnecting with your emotions in a safe, supportive environment. Book your session today and start your journey to emotional balance.

---